Every girl dreams of getting married and having kids, “perfect kids”. Kids that run, play sports, have friends, playdates, sleepovers, etc.
My name is Dawn and I have a child (Dominick) with Asperger’s & ADHD. I had a wonderful pregnancy with no complications. After an unexpected C-Section, my “dream” was born. Dominick met all milestones with no problems. He did love to play by himself and was very particular with his trains.
The only “red lights” we noticed was he hated loud music and love to spin and twirl by himself. Pre-school was overwhelming for him. Not knowing he had Asperger’s, I blamed the teachers. I sent him to a private pre-school where he did much better.
I sent him back into the “mainstream” classes for Kindergarten and first grade. This was a nightmare. Finally a teacher suggested to have him tested (he was 7 at this time). Sitting with the doctor after they game him all the necessary tests, they told us he has Asperger’s and ADHD.
I felt the life sucked right out of me. My perfect child wasn’t so perfect. In the days after the diagnosis, I cried, was in denial and couldn’t focus saying to myself everyday “why God, why??
A couple of weeks later, Dominick and I were in an expensive home goods store. Up and down the aisle we went, all with breakable items. Dominick was in the cart, so happy and singing Thomas the Tank Engine songs when out of the corner of my eye I saw a little boy in a wheelchair with his mom. He was a paraplegic who was using the motion of his head movements to move the wheel chair.
At this point, I thought to myself “how dare you feel sorry for yourself and Dominick. This was the moment I said to myself “We can do this!” “I won’t go down without a fight and will accept and embrace Asperger’s.”
From that day on, I promised myself that I will learn all about Asperger’s and will ALWAYS fight for Dominick. I know this was not going to be easy but I have accepted it and am moving on. Actually it’s been hard, very hard.
Explaining what he has to my family was one of the hardest things. Another difficult process is hearing that kids think he is weird and teachers think he is being coddled by me.
I have a boy who doesn’t like certain foods, who is socially awkward, sometimes even inappropriate. He has sensory issues, misses certain emotions, struggles to make friends, extremely unorganized and is desperate to “be cool”.
Even with all that, I would not change anything about Dominick. He is very intelligent, smart, witty, tries so hard to fit in. He is now in a mainstream inclusion class and has made honor roll. He loves building Legos, drawing pictures and when something peaks his interest, he researches this down to the smallest of details.
My Dominick isn’t perfect, but his is perfect to me. He amazes me every day. He goes to school with no complaints. He comes home from school, does his homework and chores. He tries to achieve all the goals I set for him. Dominick is a winner, he is a fighter and is the love of my life. He is my perfect boy, always and forever.