Hello again here’s this week latest blog post coming up…….

But just before that a big thank you and well done to last week’s competition winner who is Therese Dornonville - a free copy of the “Parenting Asperger’s Resource Guide Volume 2” is on it’s way shortly to you Therese………..

…….If you wish to read her great treatment tip it is Number 4 in the comments section on the following blog page:

http://parentingaspergers.com/blog/2008/01/08/glyconutrients-and-aspergers-syndrome/

This week it could be your chance to win by adding some advice or a comment on the topic of teenagers with Aspergers…..so make sure you add your comments to be in with a chance……

So here we go for week 3’s exclusive sample from the Brand New “Parenting Asperger’s Resource Guide Volume 2” (which is to be released in early February); it is based on the following question I was asked about teenagers with Aspergers…..

Question

My son has Asperger’s; he is 14 years old. What can I expect from him in the next years as a teenager?

Teenagers with Asperger’s Syndrome often have a difficult time between the ages of 12 and 18. They become isolated socially and face rejection and bullying due to the fact that they act differently from others. School is more demanding and they long for friends.

There are some teenagers, however, who do well during these years, usually because they are indifferent to peer pressure and are focused on a special interest of their own, such as music or computers. From this, we learn that encouraging teenagers to develop a special interest may help them get through the teen years more easily. Having a special interest may encourage friendships with other teens that have the same interest.

One of the biggest issues for most Asperger’s teens is that they don’t care about fads, teen clothing, celebrities, and teen rituals and expectations (phone messaging or MySpace, for instance). Sometimes their interests are more appropriate for younger children. Boys may be rejected if they are not interested in sports. With help, some of these issues can be resolved.

Teach your child to become aware of teen fads and rituals. Encourage your teen to initiate contact with peers, leave phone messages, and arrange the details of social engagements. Encourage him or her to join clubs, especially those that focus on a special interest of your teen. Your teen does not have to tell everyone that he or she has Asperger’s Syndrome. Some teens enjoy talking with other Asperger’s teens in internet chat rooms, forums, and on message boards.

Your child may neglect personal hygiene and wear clothing or hairstyles that are out of date or too young.

Find a same sex friend who will help your teen choose different, appropriate clothes to wear each day. Monitor your teen’s hygiene. Reward him or her for good hygiene, if that’s what it takes to get it!

“Aspie” teens are sometimes not very knowledgeable about sex and dating. They may be very naïve. Boys may be too forward with girls. Girls may not understand how to flirt or take flirtation too seriously. Girls may be subject to harassment or even date rape. Hormonal changes lead to rampant emotions, which Aspie teens can’t handle. They may physically attack others or “melt down” upon arriving home.

You must teach your teen about sex. Be specific and detailed about safe sex. Teach your child to confide in you by never being judgmental or punitive. Don’t skip the little things, such as explaining to girls that they shouldn’t sit on laps or give hugs and kisses to strangers. Boys may need to be told that masturbating should take place in private.

Some Aspies develop problems with drugs and alcohol because they are so lonely and anxious to fit in. They are not able to discern a “good” crowd from a “bad” crowd. Other teens may take advantage of the Aspies naiveté to get him or her to buy alcohol or acquire drugs. If stopped by a police officer, an Aspie might appear to be a smart-aleck due to bluntly honest responses to questions.

Emphasize that drugs and underaged alcohol are illegal. Since Aspies are rule-oriented, this may help them avoid problems.

Though smart, an Asperger’s teen may have school problems because of the difficulty in dealing with more than one teacher. Some teachers may be hostile. Each classroom is a different environment for the teen to get used to, which leads to distractibility and problems with organization. Large projects, such as a term paper, may be overwhelming.

Some Aspies need special education in high school, even though they didn’t need it before. Make sure your teen has a “safe place” at school where he or she can share emotions with a trusted advisor. This person could be a teacher, nurse, guidance counsellor, or psychologist.

Suicide may become a possibility for some teens with Asperger’s. If you have any worries about this, get help immediately from a psychologist or psychiatrist.

At this time of life, parents need to use reasoning and negotiation with Asperger’s teens, instead of orders. Your teen will be more hostile and less likely to listen (like all teens!). The teen may hate school and resist everything he’s been taught to do up to this point. Depression is common.

If your child is experiencing tremendous pressure, harassment, and/or rejection at school and the staff does not try to help, it may be time to find another school. A special education placement or a therapeutic boarding school can give professionals a chance to guide your teen academically and socially. They won’t allow your teen to isolate himself. They can help with college placement.

If your child remains in public school, be sure he or she has an IEP (Individual Education Plan), even if you have to get an advocacy group or attorney to obtain the services your child needs.

Most Aspies learn to drive well because they obey the rules! Have your child carry a cell phone and a card that explains Asperger’s. Teach your child to call you in a crisis and to give the card to any police officer who stops him or her.

Some Aspies do well in summer jobs in an area of their special interest or in jobs with little interaction with the public.

Above all, ask for help from professionals when your teen needs it.

Well that’s all for the article – but don’t forget to add your teenage tip or comment to the blog for a chance to win a Brand New free copy of the “Parenting Asperger’s Resource Guide Volume 2”……

Best Wishes

Dave Angel