Welcome to the twenty-third edition of “The Parenting Autism & Aspergers Newsletter”…

Inside this edition you will find:

1. Hot Topic of Discussion - Handling Big Emotions and Asperger
Syndrome by Lisa Jo Rudy

2. In the News – Autism, Aspergers and Evolution By Rusty Rockets

3. Parenting Tips - Making Friends - How Parents Can
Help Their Kids With Friendship By Patricia J. Robinson

4. Prominent People Linked with ASD - Charles Lindbergh, Aviator

Thanks

Dave

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1. Hot Topic of Discussion - Handling Big Emotions and Asperger
Syndrome by Lisa Jo Rudy

(Question) Many people believe that people with autism have fewer
and less intense emotions than their peers. But those of us who know
Aspies know how wrong that is. It appears to us that people with
autism are more emotional than neurotypical folks.  An example
of this is Aspie teenagers who manage just fine at school for
awhile, but suddenly break down into tears, a panic attack, or
a tantrum when something goes wrong. How do parents help them
manage overwhelming anxiety/emotion?

(Answer) There are simple tricks like deep breathing, counting,
or stepping away, but it is not always easy for Aspies to
remember to use them. It helps to do something to decrease the
emotionality of a situation, if possible. Music helped me do that
because I could pour my emotions into it. Sometimes I would
explore the hills and meadows around my home. It helped to be
involved in activities that I enjoyed, that helped me make
friends. In my teen years, I was focused on myself and could not
sense what others felt or feel empathy for them. I eventually
learned to get rid of people who tried to become friends with
me for my financial means and those who wanted to involve me
in inappropriate activities.

To read the full article please go to: http://autism.about.com/b/2008/07/28/your-advice-requested-handling-big-emotions-and-asperger-syndrome.htm

People mentioned as having Asperger Syndrome may or may not
have actually have been diagnosed with it.

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2. In the News – 28 July 2005: Autism, Aspergers and Evolution
By Rusty Rockets

What is the difference between a genetic abnormality and genetic
evolution? Is genetic evolution resposible for mental disorders?
Researchers do not know the causes of autism and Aspergers disorders,
but they believe that autism and Aspergers are genetically oriented.
Are these “disorders” actually evolution at work?

“From my clinical experience I consider that children and adults
with Aspergers Syndrome have a different, not defective, way of
thinking,” states Tony Attwood, a clinical psychologist and author
of Aspergers Syndrome: A Guide for Parents and Professionals.
“Each person has a perspective on the world; autism and Asperger’s
may be the extremes of individual perspectives. The information that
our brains receive is analyzed and processed to cope with everyday life.
How this happens depends on how our brains are constructed and how genes
and DNA allow our brains to operate.”

This creates great variation in individual people and external factors
may also affect how genes work. Recent studies show that autism and
Aspergers probably do have genetic roots.  Experts claim that autism
occurs in 1:1000, and Aspergers disorder in 1:150 to 1:500 so there
are myriad ways in which people interpret the world, and perspectives
might be passed on to children and grandchildren.

A study by the Mount Sinai School of Medicine, published in the American
Journal of Psychiatry, claims that autism is a result of between five
and ten genetic mutations. “Having one of these variants appears to
approximately double an individuals risk for the disorder, but it is
an accumulation of genetic factors that cause the disease,” says Joseph
Buxbaum, Associate Professor of Psychiatry. “Identifying all or most of
the genes involved will lead to new diagnostic tools and new approaches
to treatment,” Buxbaum concludes. Considering that autism affects
a person’s mental condition, any treatment for autism or Aspergers
may also change personality; something to think about! If
autism is separated from the person, the person who is left will not
be the same person.

If autism is proven to be genetic, it cannot be “cured” without changing
the person dramatically.  So, are these “disorders” really evolution
at work?

To read the article go to: http://www.scienceagogo.com/news/autism_evolution.shtml

People mentioned above as having Asperger Syndrome may or may not
have actually have been diagnosed with it.

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3. Parenting Tips - Making Friends - How Parents Can Help Their Kids
With Friendship By Patricia J. Robinson

For some children, especially those diagnosed with autism, Aspergers,
or ADHD, making friends can be very difficult. If a child cannot make
and keep friends, life is miserable. But, there are simple steps that
parents can take to help make friendships easier for children.

1. Talk about it. Make sure there really is a problem. Some kids need
a lot of alone time.  Discuss friendship with your child and set a
realistic goal, such as two friends or someone to eat lunch with.

2. Get to know other parents. Other parents are a great resource and
can introduce your child around. A great place to meet them is
after school when you pick up your kid. Show up early, smile and chat,
while your child plays with the other kids.  For older kids, volunteer
at school as a way to meet other parents.

3. Join groups. Find a group your child can join: scouts, after
school classes, a sports team, or play group.

4. Work on social skills. Watch your child as he or she interacts with
other children.  What problems do you see?  Wait until you get home and
then talk to your child; if problems are serious or numerous, handle
them in a social skills group.

5. Pay attention to appearance. Observe the other kids at school. Does
your child stand out from the rest? Get rid of the too-short pants and
over-sized sweatshirt so your child will fit in with the group. Pay attention
to hygiene and behavior. Behavior that is appropriate for much younger
children can be the kiss of death as your child gets older.

6. Beware of being too different.  Even though your child may be brilliant
and unique, other kids may just think he is weird if he cannot discuss
kid-type interests. He does not have to give up his special interests.
Supplement them with knowledge that kids of his age have and enjoy sharing. Sit down as a family and watch popular TV shows or current movies.

7. Invite someone over. Discuss in advance what activities your child might
enjoy with a friend, role play a bit, and then step out of the picture.
Set up a few simple projects in case things do not go smoothly, such as an easy craft or a movie.

8. If your child can make just one friend, that makes the school day enjoyable. He will have a partner for projects and someone to eat lunch with.

9. But, if at all possible, encourage your child to develop more friendships so that the one friend will not get burned out.

10. The teacher may be able to step in and assist your child. Many teachers will set up work groups to help shy kids socialize. Find a social skills group.
Therapists can work on the basics with your child, too.

To read the full article go to: http://patriciarobinsonmft.com/download.asp

Please post any tips that you have and I will publish them.

You can post them at:

http://parentingaspergers.com/blog/parenting-tips-wanted/

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4. Prominent People Linked with ASD - Charles Lindbergh, Aviator

On Oct. 4, 2006, Michael Fitzgerald of Trinity College, Dublin, Ireland
presented a paper “Autism, Aspergers Syndrome and Creativity,” mentioning Charles Lindbergh as having had Aspergers.

Charles Lindbergh (1902-1974), was an American pilot who made the first lone non-stop flight across the Atlantic Ocean in 1927. He was awarded the Medal of Honor (USA) and the French Legion of Honor, as well as a Pulitzer Prize for his autobiography. Lindbergh is one of the famous people described in the book “Genius Genes: How Asperger Talents Changed the World” by Michael Fitzgerald and Brendan O’Brien.

Lindbergh, known as Lucky Lindy, was born in Detroit, Michigan. His father, Charles Lindbergh Sr., was a lawyer and later a U.S. Congressman. In 1922, Charles, Jr. quit a mechanical engineering program and joined a pilot training program, bought his own plane, and became a stunt pilot. In 1924, he trained as a pilot with the Army Air Service.

After his first solo flight across the Atlantic Ocean, Lindbergh gained international fame. He flew from New York to Paris on May 20-May 21, 1927 in his single-engine aircraft “The Spirit of St. Louis,” flying for 33.5 hours. Lindbergh is also recognized for charting polar air-routes, high altitude flying techniques, and increasing aircraft flying ranges by decreasing fuel consumption.

According to a Biography Channel program on Lindbergh, Anne Morrow Lindbergh, was the only woman he ever asked out on a date before marriage. He taught her how to fly. They had six children, the first of whom, Charles Augustus Lindbergh III, 20 months old, was kidnapped on March 1, 1932. His body was found on May 12 in New Jersey, after a nationwide search and ransom negotiations with the kidnappers. The man accused of the murder, Bruno Hauptmann, went on trial and was convicted. The Lindberghs moved to Europe in December, 1935. Hauptmann was executed on April 3, 1936.

Charles Lindbergh has been reported to have been a recluse, but after his death, one of his daughters discovered that he had three other families in Europe and had fathered six or seven children in addition to the six with Anne Morrow.

To see the full text of the article go to: http.www.wikipedia.org

People mentioned above as having Asperger Syndrome may or may not have actually have been diagnosed with it.
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I hope you have enjoyed this month’s newsletter.

The next edition of the newsletter is due in October.

And as ever … please send in any inspirational stories
that you know of, any questions that you would like our team
of experts to answer, any topics that you wish to be discussed
and news stories that you want to share VIA THE BLOG.

We will publish as many as we can.

Until next month………

Best Wishes

Dave Angel

http://www.parentingaspergers.com

P.S. Please feel free to forward this newsletter to your
friends.

Due to problems in people seeing this article - this is a test post to see if it will resolve the issue:

I’ve just been to the local Play Zone with my daughter so I’m hoping to get this blog entry done quickly – whilst she sleeps off her morning’s exercise! My baby’s growing up – she’s all of 15 months now! So here goes for this week’s article on social skills …

Question

I would like to know how to advise my son on social skills, such as making friends without being insulting to others.

Answer

One of the behavioural traits seen in children with Asperger’s Syndrome is a lack of empathy. They don’t realize that other people have thoughts and interests that are different from theirs. They’ll interrupt a conversation and start churning out facts about their pet interest - which could be something like medieval history, Star Wars’ trivia, or math - even if it has nothing to do with what the other children are talking about. This and their lack of other social skills, such as looking others in the eyes when conversing, responding appropriately to greetings and questions, and understanding fads and the interests of peers makes making friends very difficult for Asperger’s children.

With some Asperger’s children, social abilities remain intact or aren’t really noticed until around age eight. It is around this time that their classmates begin perceiving them as “different.” The child is singled out for teasing. In addition, the child may be seen as oppositional because children with Asperger’s Syndrome take words and gestures very literally. Communication with Asperger’s children must be “concrete” (brief and easily understood).

Your son can be taught most of the same social skills that children without Asperger’s learn on their own. You can work with your son’s school to produce cards or posters with facial expressions that define feelings. Also, full-length mirrors can be used to make children aware of their facial expressions and overall body language. You and his teachers can role play social situations with him to help him learn appropriate responses and actions.

Speaking of schools, it is unfortunate that there are few schools fully equipped to help children with Asperger’s Syndrome. The number of schools with diagnostically appropriate services will increase when parents, doctors, and social service practitioners lobby educational institutions for assistance in teaching Asperger’s children.

Until the school provides more assistance with your son, there are a number of things that you can do at home. You can surround your son with friends and family so he will have familiar people around on a consistent basis. If your son is intimidated by a large number of people, just have one friend over at a time.

In addition to friends, you can train your son in appropriate social and perceptual skills. He can learn to perceive and interpret nonverbal behaviors, process visual and auditory information, and become aware of social/behavioural conventions. To help you with teaching your son social skills, you might want to purchase the video productions “Model Me Conversation” and “Model Me Friendship.” Click the link below to access them:

Social Skills

In addition to the above videos, there is a book titled:

Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships: Understanding and Managing Social Challenges for Those with Aspergers/Autism

written by Temple Grandin and Sean Barron. Both Grandin and Barron are diagnosed as having high-functioning autism, and they have written a book that helps people with Asperger’s Syndrome cope with daily social demands.

To help you help your son, go on the internet and look for Asperger’s Syndrome support groups. Look for a group in your area. If there is none available, there are people who stay in touch via the internet. Whether in person or over the internet, they can give you advice and support which will help you help your son.

PS – I’ve got some great news about the new website. I’ve finally found some software that can do everything that a web community needs to keep in touch, updated with developments on all things Aspergers etc. Plus the exciting part is this software is about to be upgraded to allow people in the community to be able to have their own little area like on MySpace on Facebook.

So for those who really want to share, grow and develop with other parents this will be an awesome addition. But don’t worry this won’t be compulsory! So if you prefer to stay low key and just update yourself on the new developments, research and ideas at the website then that will be just fine too.

And some slight bad news … it looks likely to be around January when I can have all this ready to go. Which when you think we’re already in October isn’t too long anyway really.

PPS – The newsletter for this month will be out in the next few days; sorry for the delay!

Take Care

Dave Angel

Hello there and I hope you’re having a happy Tuesday. I’ve just been to the local Play Zone with my daughter so I’m hoping to get this blog entry done quickly – whilst she sleeps off her morning’s exercise! My baby’s growing up – she’s all of 15 months now! So here goes for this week’s article on social skills …

Question

I would like to know how to advise my son on social skills, such as making friends without being insulting to others.

Answer

One of the behavioural traits seen in children with Asperger’s Syndrome is a lack of empathy. They don’t realize that other people have thoughts and interests that are different from theirs. They’ll interrupt a conversation and start churning out facts about their pet interest - which could be something like medieval history, Star Wars’ trivia, or math - even if it has nothing to do with what the other children are talking about. This and their lack of other social skills, such as looking others in the eyes when conversing, responding appropriately to greetings and questions, and understanding fads and the interests of peers makes making friends very difficult for Asperger’s children.

With some Asperger’s children, social abilities remain intact or aren’t really noticed until around age eight. It is around this time that their classmates begin perceiving them as “different.” The child is singled out for teasing. In addition, the child may be seen as oppositional because children with Asperger’s Syndrome take words and gestures very literally. Communication with Asperger’s children must be “concrete” (brief and easily understood).

Your son can be taught most of the same social skills that children without Asperger’s learn on their own. You can work with your son’s school to produce cards or posters with facial expressions that define feelings. Also, full-length mirrors can be used to make children aware of their facial expressions and overall body language. You and his teachers can role play social situations with him to help him learn appropriate responses and actions.

Speaking of schools, it is unfortunate that there are few schools fully equipped to help children with Asperger’s Syndrome. The number of schools with diagnostically appropriate services will increase when parents, doctors, and social service practitioners lobby educational institutions for assistance in teaching Asperger’s children.

Until the school provides more assistance with your son, there are a number of things that you can do at home. You can surround your son with friends and family so he will have familiar people around on a consistent basis. If your son is intimidated by a large number of people, just have one friend over at a time.

In addition to friends, you can train your son in appropriate social and perceptual skills. He can learn to perceive and interpret nonverbal behaviors, process visual and auditory information, and become aware of social/behavioural conventions. To help you with teaching your son social skills, you might want to purchase the video productions “Model Me Conversation” and “Model Me Friendship.” Click the link below to access them:

Social Skills

In addition to the above videos, there is a book titled:

Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships: Understanding and Managing Social Challenges for Those with Aspergers/Autism

written by Temple Grandin and Sean Barron. Both Grandin and Barron are diagnosed as having high-functioning autism, and they have written a book that helps people with Asperger’s Syndrome cope with daily social demands.

To help you help your son, go on the internet and look for Asperger’s Syndrome support groups. Look for a group in your area. If there is none available, there are people who stay in touch via the internet. Whether in person or over the internet, they can give you advice and support which will help you help your son.

PS – I’ve got some great news about the new website. I’ve finally found some software that can do everything that a web community needs to keep in touch, updated with developments on all things Aspergers etc. Plus the exciting part is this software is about to be upgraded to allow people in the community to be able to have their own little area like on MySpace on Facebook.

So for those who really want to share, grow and develop with other parents this will be an awesome addition. But don’t worry this won’t be compulsory! So if you prefer to stay low key and just update yourself on the new developments, research and ideas at the website then that will be just fine too.

And some slight bad news … it looks likely to be around January when I can have all this ready to go. Which when you think we’re already in October isn’t too long anyway really.

PPS – The newsletter for this month will be out in the next few days; sorry for the delay!

Take Care

Dave Angel

Hi there and I hope you’re having a good week so far. We’ve had a few rare rays of sunshine for the last couple of days here in the UK – but true to form it looks like rain again today!

This week’s article looks into something called “selective mutism” and its links to Aspergers …

Question

One of my Aspie sons (17) hollers when distressed; the other (15) gets more silent. It’s the silent one I worry about, but social integration suffers for both. I just hope it gets better in adulthood. What’s known about “selective mutism?”

Answer

The Definition of Selective Mutism

Selective Mutism is a psychiatric disorder, and it is most commonly found in children.

The predominant feature of Selective Mutism is a persistent failure to speak in various settings. This lack of vocal skills usually lasts for more than one month. Typically, a child who exhibits the signs of Selective Mutism will speak with their parents, but with few other people. These children aren’t known for speaking in a school setting or in social situations that they perceive to be stressful. Studies indicate that Selective Mutism is related to anxiety and shyness; however, the specific cause is unknown.

Children with Selective Mutism will respond to people using silent physical responses like pointing, nodding their heads, or simply remaining motionless. It can be difficult to discern what the child wants when there is little responsive information available; yet, the meaning of the child’s limited actions can only be guessed until it appears that the child has had its needs met.

The child appears to be withdrawn during the early years, and a diagnosis of Selective Mutism may not be given until the child has entered school. When the diagnosis has been made, the child has been used to communicating with physical motions and not speech; therefore, physical communication has become the most familiar response for the child.

The Diagnosis of Selective Mutism

These are the diagnostic criteria for Selective Mutism; the child:

1. Will not speak in school or in social situations
2. Has an inability to speak that interferes with their ability to successfully function in school and/or social settings
3. Exhibits mutism that has persisted for at least one month
4. Is not experiencing a communication disorder, and the mutism is not occurring along with another mental disorder.

A child is most likely to develop Selective Mutism if they exhibit a genetic predisposition to anxiety. In addition, the child may demonstrate severe anxiety, temper tantrums, crying, mood changes, sleep problems, and extreme shyness. Some theorists state that mutism is developed to control feelings of internal anxiety when in social situations. The children will speak normally when they are in a setting that they feel is comfortable, and when they feel secure and relaxed.

The Treatment of Selective Mutism

1. Behaviour Modification – Desensitization and positive reinforcement for speaking to familiar people
2. Self-Esteem Enhancement – Placing an emphasis on the child’s successes
3. Socialization – Meeting and spending time with familiar people first, then unfamiliar people with familiar people present
4. Cognitive Therapy – A form of behaviour change that helps replace fears with positive activities
5. Medication – Short-term (less than one year) psychotropic administration.

When Selective Mutism is accurately diagnosed and properly treated, the symptoms can be controlled and minimized. This contributes to the child’s being able to communicate with others, and it will increase self sufficiency and self esteem. When Selective Mutism is treated and monitored, the child can move from suffering in silence to active communication and social integration.

That’s all for this week - but I just wanted to let you know that I am still working away the best I can behind the scenes on the new Aspergers website! I noticed a comment on the blog this week – that some people are struggling to read the full articles. This is a problem that seems to persist whatever my web guy does – as people use different internet browsers, so it affects different people.

But the new website will definitely not have this problem and will be much easier to navigate and use. I am currently looking at the different kinds of software available for you guys; so it may be some time before everything is completed. But be assured it’s a work in progress – and I’ll keep up-dating you as it develops.

Have a great day

Dave Angel

Hi there – this week’s Aspergers articles looks at explaining Aspergers to other people. The new web project is now coming along well and one thing I noticed whilst researching new articles is that there are a lot more subscribers with daughters than I realised. Despite Aspergers being a largely male diagnosis (statistically at least) there are a lot of you parents with female aspies. So I’m going to work hard at covering this more on the new site. Here’s this week’s article:

Question

My 11 year old son has just been diagnosed with Asperger’s, and I’d like to know what to tell friends, neighbours, teachers, and extended family to help them understand his behaviour.

Answer

Asperger’s Syndrome was first noticed in 1944, and it was first seen in children that had been diagnosed with autistic personality disorder. A researcher by the name of Asperger worked with children and saw that they exhibited delays in social maturity, social reasoning, and social abilities. He found verbal- and non-verbal impairments in communication, especially when the children attempted to converse. Asperger also observed that the children had difficulties controlling emotions, but they could intellectualize their feelings.

Further research by Asperger found that the children became preoccupied with various interests and these would dominate their thought processes. Asperger also found that some of the children were having learning problems, difficulty with coordination, and that they exhibited a marked sensitivity to certain smells, sounds, and textures.

You can start sharing information by giving friends and relatives an introduction to Asperger’s Syndrome using the above paragraphs. This will provide them with some history and context. Sharing information on any illness or diagnosis requires tact and discretion. You might want to tell the people in your life on a “need-to-know” basis.

It is very important to stress that a diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome does not make your child “weird” or inferior. Make sure you stress the positive elements that can be found in people with Asperger’s Syndrome. There are actors, authors, researchers, and scientists who have been diagnosed with Asperger’s, and they have achieved seemingly insurmountable life goals. When your friends and relatives are aware of these facts, it will help dispel the mystery and confusion that surrounds Asperger’s.

When you discuss Asperger’s Syndrome with children, you can use classroom materials that have been developed to assist children in understanding this diagnosis. Go on the internet to a company called AAPC and you will find several books about Asperger’s. Also, look for a local group that helps people and their relatives cope with Asperger’s Syndrome.

One highly recommended book is Asperger’s Syndrome: A Guide for Parents and Professionals by Tony Attwood. Mr. Attwood is a leading expert on Asperger’s Syndrome, and his book provides a wealth of information that you can use as discussion topics.

After you have shared some of the above information, ask the person/people you are talking with if they have any questions or concerns about anything that you have discussed. Let them know that any question or concern they may have is valid, and you are not going to be offended by their inquiries. Not only will this ease communications, it will prove you to be a mature, open-minded individual who loves your child and cares about friends and family.

Thanks and have a great day

Dave Angel