Question

I need help managing the frustration and anger that arise each day, and managing an extroverted child with Aspergers.

Answer

It can be very common for children with Aspergers to deal with anger of a daily basis.  Your son’s frustrations come from his inability to understand social cues, and his other social deficits.  The good thing is that his anger can get better as he better understands the unspoken social aspects of today’s society.  Try a few of these options to get his anger and frustrations under control.

• Consider enrolling your son in anger management classes.  Even if his anger and frustrations are mild, anger management classes will offer a great deal of help to you in this situation.  The anger management personnel will help your son work through his anger and frustration issues. Often anger management classes are available at schools so check with the school personnel to see if this option is available.  There are also options to participate in these classes in your local community.   The personnel will help you decide what options are best for your child.

• Let your son participate in counseling sessions.  Counseling sessions are available for individuals and groups.  He may enjoy receiving group counseling with his peers at school, if this option is available. You do not necessarily have to pay for your son’s counseling. Again, the schools should have highly skilled counselors that can help your son work through his frustrations and anger issues. You should begin to see improvement after a few sessions.

• Spend some time with your son each day.  It is not that you do not spend enough time with your son now, but it may be more beneficial if you spend designated time with him each day. Sometimes children with Aspergers will act out if they have to compete with other children in the family or other people in general.  Make him feel special by offering special time to spend with him doing the things that he enjoys.

• Allow your son to exercise daily or participate in sports. Exercise and sports are a good way to get out your son’s frustrations.  He may want to enroll in a sport through his school or his community.  If he has issues with being around people, you may want to allow him to exercise or play sports at home.  Many children with Aspergers enjoy playing video games so you may want to find one that has fitness options.

Keep your son occupied as much as you can.  He may forget the source of his anger and frustration when he is too busy to think about them.  Occupy his time with the things he enjoys in life.

Thanks,

Dave Angel

Additional Resources

Indigo Dreams: Garden of Wellness Stories And Techniques Designed to Decrease Stress, Anger, Anxiety While Promoting Self (CD’s) by Lori Lite