We bought a little toy that launches a small wooden glider in the air and then we simply ran through the park chasing it. We worked up from there. Always with a reward for participating that was also scheduled into the plan and always withheld if there was not good participation.

I agree with the most of the article’s information with the exception of having a ’short dialog’ with the child about a new activity.
Too much talk or discussion typically has a negative effect or ends up in a power struggle or melt down.
My 8 yr son, has a melt down if we change our routine without advising him in advance. That gives him time to process and prepare for some new adventures (AKA stress)
I often wonder if they are truly as sad as they look, or is it their flat affect or lack of expression? I hope it’s happier on the inside for these kids.
Getting outside and getting some exercise has become a huge challenge for us due to his significant orthopedic issues with his hips/femurs/feet which have become more debilitating in the last yr. As a result his weight has really balloned in the last year which further complicates things.

How many of these kids have weight issues?

My 50 cents worth of comment is:
Take the time to prepare for a new activity so that your child doesn’t feel your stress or anxiety of rushing to make arrangements for a ‘big outing’.Let your child know in advance - sometimes that only means 10 minutes - state it as a matter of fact - not a discussion or choice - we are going to the park to feed the ducks, and take a walk in 10 minutes - that works for us.Let him make some choices during the activity - teaching him to make decisions in a new environment is the most challenging - but it’s one of the most important survival skills we need to teach our children.

Be patient - everything takes 50% more time with these kids - at least my son…. rejoice in the happy moments when they happen, and try not to focus too much on the limitations. When I do that, I end up isolating myself from the world thinking that I am protecting my child from scrutiny and judgements, and avoiding other parents telling me I don’t know how to dicipline my child. (He’s my 3rd btw - other 2 are professional, and productive adults)
Thanks again Dave.

But: WATCH YOURSELF while talking! Be NEUTRAL, positive and helpful in a gentle, decisive way. Ask CONCRETE questions. Built in short silences, so that your child gets time to react.

Our son with Asperger won’t listen/discuss any activitiy with us when we have the (hidden) intention to persuade him of our views / if we are eager to help him. (= not neutral).

But when we describe to him what we saw during his activity, “I saw a smile on your face when you set on the swing. I saw your legs going up high, you made the swing move.” (=neutral), our son opens up.

This happens too, when we ask him which positive/helping thought could help him to take a next step. And if we ask him what the next step will be, his confidence grows.

This is how we do it: At the beginning of a new activitiy, its our son who decides which step he will take, to make sure he is in control of everything. We react enthousiastic and supporting to every tiny step he suggests. We ask him what we can do to help him when he will take his step. (Where do you want me to sit/stand? What do I have to say/do?) This reassures him and gives him strength.

When our son ‘grows’ into the activity, we ‘negociate’ by suggesting a (little) bigger step than he suggests – remembring him of his success of the last time he did this activity. Telling him we are sure he can do it. Letting him in control: he is the one who decides. This gives him confidence.
Sometimes he accepts our suggestion. Sometimes he suggests bigger steps then we ourselves would ever have thougt of!