"Daily Asperger's Tips - Sign up to receive FREE daily emails (a mix of ideas . . . inspiration . . . strategies . . . tips and humor - for parents of children with Asperger's).

Plus a FREE digital copy of the Aspirations monthly newsletter (normally only available to paying members of The Parenting Asperger's Community)."

    • Home
    • About
    • Contact
    • Privacy

How to help my son with Aspergers to make friends and fit in better?

Filed under:Sex and Relationships — posted by admin on June 22, 2010 @ 11:29 am

How to help my son with Aspergers to make friends and fit in better? He is 10. He wants friends but how to get him to understand those who say they are friends but are just using him.

As a parent, your goal is a normal life for your son with Aspergers.  Friends are a big part of what we consider a normal life.  Without friends, it seems a person would be sad and lonely.  Some people do better with one or two good friends, while others feel the need to be surrounded by friends.  Chances are, your son falls somewhere in the middle. 

For a child with Aspergers, friends may seem beyond reach and understanding.  The desire is there, but because of low social skills, the knowledge of making and keeping friends is lacking.  Thankfully, these skills can be learned to a certain extent; well enough for a child to make and keep a few good friends.  These social skills are important for building friendships.

* Eye contact

* Ability to read social cues, gestures, and body language

* Understanding the concepts of sharing, taking turns, and two-way conversation

* Ability to understand and use slang, humor, and sarcasm

* Ability to give and take constructive criticism

* Being mindful of other people’s feelings; empathy

* Personal hygiene

All of these social skills, plus others, can be taught to enhance the Aspergers friend connection.  At the age of ten, your son should have access to support at school.  Social skills training, occupational therapy, sensory integration therapy, speech-language therapy, and cognitive-behavioral therapy are often suggested treatments for children with Aspergers Syndrome.  In addition, parents should also supplement these treatments with their own input at home.  Here are a few suggestions.

* Social skills classes can usually be found through Autism support groups.  Other opportunities for your child to learn hands-on social skills (with your guidance) are in groups or clubs geared to his special interests. 

* Children with Aspergers Syndrome are often rule followers.  Make a written list of rules used when dealing with friends.  For example, I will not stand too close to my friend; I will pay attention when he talks and take turns talking about things we both like; I will be mindful of my friend’s feelings.

* You can use social stories to guide your son through specific situations.  These stories are simply written, straightforward, and detailed.

* Role-playing is a very effective teaching tool for children with Asperger’s.  Play the role of a friend and act out a variety of scenarios.  Practice makes perfect!

* Peer mentoring is another option.  This is commonly used in the school environment, but you could find a relative or family friend to be your son’s peer model.  He can shadow this mentor and watch friends in action.

To get another perspective, check out this book by Joanna Keating-Velasco:  “A is for Autism, F is for Friend”.  This book is written from the perspective of an 11-year-old with Autism. 

Thanks for reading,

Dave Angel

============================================================

Articles posted this week at The Parenting Aspergers Community
============================================================

How can I stop my son with Aspergers from touching other people’s faces?

People need personal space and will go to great lengths to protect their personal space, even to the point of anger. Unfortunately, children with Asperger’s Syndrome do not understand the concept of personal space. This lack of understanding, accompanied by the child’s weaknesses in the area of social skills and communication, make for a potential sticky situation. However, children with Asperger’s can be taught about personal space and unwanted touching …

To read the full article go to: –

http://www.parentingaspergerscommunity.com/members/550.cfm

==========================================================

My 11-year-old girl with Aspergers has mood swings, what can I do about them?

A common complaint from parents of children with Asperger’s is dealing with the mood swings and meltdowns that are a component of Asperger’s Syndrome. Emotional interaction and social communication are difficult for these children. These difficulties cause frustration that has to be relieved in some manner. Hence, the reckless mood swings …

To read the full article go to: –

http://www.parentingaspergerscommunity.com/members/549.cfm

============================================================

What is NLP and can it be helpful for Asperger’s?

NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming is a behavioral or communication technology. Using NLP techniques, you can change or eradicate unwanted behaviors and implement positive behaviors. NLP has been referred to as an instruction manual for your mind. The name itself represents the connection between the brain, language, and the body. The techniques used in NLP call upon the complete realm of your life experiences: mentally, emotionally, and physically, to create lasting positive change …

To read the full article go to: –

http://www.parentingaspergerscommunity.com/members/548.cfm

============================================================

comments (2)

2 comments »

  1. Friends are the hardest area for my 10 year old! He often says, “Everyone likes me, but I don’t have any friends.” Meaning no one is mean, but no one seeks him out. We just tell him to be patient, his friends are out there. Thanks for the help!

    Comment by Sara — June 22, 2010 @ 1:10 pm

  2. totally agree except my son who is also 10 is more negative, and thinks everyone hates him how do i explain this?

    Comment by Dawn — July 15, 2010 @ 3:09 pm

Copy link for RSS feed for comments on this post or for TrackBack URI

Leave a comment


CAPTCHA
Refresh

*




  • FREE Offer for New Website Readers. Get My FREE daily Asperger's Parenting Tips and a FREE Digital Copy of the Aspirations Monthly Newsletter.


     
     

    Parenting Aspergers Volume 1

    What Every Parent Ought To Know About Their Aspergers Child

     

    Parenting ADHD Volume 1

    How to Quickly and Easily Gain Dramatic Improvements in your ADHD Child's Behaviors

     

    Autism Asperger Publishing Company

    The Number 1 Resource for Autism and Aspergers Books, DVD's, CD's and other great materials.

    Autism Asperger Publishing Co.

  • Recent Posts

    • A very final thought
    • [Action Required] otherwise this really is goodbye
    • Is this (nearly) goodbye?
    • The clock's a tickin'
    • 5 signs of parental stress
  • Most Popular Posts

      • My son with Aspergers doesn’t want to go school and just wants to play computer games
      • The Eating Habits of a Child with Aspergers
      • Aspergers and Valentines Day
      • How to deal with Aspergers anxiety
      • Mind Blindness and Aspergers Syndrome
  • Categories:

    • Aspergers Adults
    • Aspergers Behavior
    • Aspergers Children
    • Aspergers Communication
    • Aspergers Diagnosis
    • Aspergers Eating
    • Aspergers Education
    • Aspergers Employment
    • Aspergers Girls
    • Aspergers Health
    • Aspergers Mental Health
    • Aspergers Sex
    • Aspergers Siblings
    • Aspergers Therapy
    • Independence
    • Mental Health
    • New Parenting Aspergers Website Launch
    • Other
    • Parents Issues
    • Sex and Relationships
    • Siblings
    • Social Skills
    • Teenagers
    • Treatments/Therapies
  • Pages:

    • About
    • How To Use This Blog
    • Privacy Policy
    • Yes or No
    • Contact
  • Archives:

    • May 2018
    • April 2018
    • March 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018
    • December 2017
    • November 2017
    • October 2017
    • September 2017
    • August 2017
    • July 2017
    • June 2017
    • May 2017
    • January 2017
    • December 2016
    • May 2016
    • April 2016
    • March 2016
    • February 2016
    • December 2015
    • November 2015
    • October 2015
    • June 2015
    • May 2015
    • April 2015
    • March 2015
    • February 2015
    • January 2015
    • December 2014
    • November 2014
    • October 2014
    • September 2014
    • August 2014
    • July 2014
    • May 2014
    • April 2014
    • March 2014
    • February 2014
    • January 2014
    • October 2013
    • September 2013
    • August 2013
    • July 2013
    • June 2013
    • May 2013
    • April 2013
    • March 2013
    • February 2013
    • January 2013
    • December 2012
    • November 2012
    • October 2012
    • September 2012
    • August 2012
    • July 2012
    • June 2012
    • May 2012
    • April 2012
    • March 2012
    • February 2012
    • January 2012
    • December 2011
    • November 2011
    • October 2011
    • September 2011
    • August 2011
    • July 2011
    • June 2011
    • May 2011
    • April 2011
    • March 2011
    • February 2011
    • January 2011
    • December 2010
    • November 2010
    • October 2010
    • September 2010
    • August 2010
    • July 2010
    • June 2010
    • May 2010
    • April 2010
    • March 2010
    • February 2010
    • January 2010
    • December 2009
    • November 2009
    • October 2009
    • September 2009
    • August 2009
    • July 2009
    • June 2009
    • May 2009
    • April 2009
    • March 2009
    • February 2009
    • January 2009
    • December 2008
    • November 2008
    • October 2008
    • September 2008
    • August 2008
    • July 2008
    • June 2008
    • May 2008
    • April 2008
    • March 2008
    • February 2008
    • January 2008
    • December 2007
  • December 2019
    MTWTFSS
    « May  
     1
    2345678
    9101112131415
    16171819202122
    23242526272829
    3031 

Subscribe:

RSS Feed
Subscribe to Bloglines
Subscribe to Google
Subscribe to MyYahoo!
Subscribe to MyMSN
Subscribe to MyAOL
Subscribe to Newsgator
Digg It
Subscribe to Netscape


Home