When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

Tara — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 22:18:07 +0000

We talk to our 7-yr old son about his “brain wiring” – that the same thing that makes him brilliant at maths and logic are the same things that make him feel like it is difficult to play on the playground. And we point out the way his other friends have differences too, so that it doesn’t feel like it is just him. That he is a unique individual, not just a disorder – as is everyone.

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

Peta — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 22:46:13 +0000

How do I tell my 7 year old child she has Aspergers??

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

ROBIN — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 15:07:51 +0000

Check out Big Brother 11. I thing Michele has asperger, she is really smart, not so good with people. My son has asperger.

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

Mark 42 — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 19:34:27 +0000

As a parent of a child with Asperger’s, and an aspy myself, I want to add one caution:
I encountered a young boy who behaved like a wild animal, and when I confronted him on his behavior, he said “I have a syndrome” as if that was supposed to excuse it.
Long story short – no one seems to expect him to behave to his potential because they don’t realize his capabilities are better than what they accept. This is hurting him far more than helping him.
I find it frustrating that adults assume he has to behave like a barely trained animal when he could do much better.
He’ll never be “Normal”, but he could be so much more than what he will be if his parents continue to let him grow up with zero discipline.
It’s okay to tell the child, but don’t let it be an excuse for not living up to his or her potential. Finding the right balance between expectations and allowances is not easy, but kids often rise to expectations when given the chance, so don’t miss the opportunity for them to grow and achieve.

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

Lynda Maniscalco — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 03:53:50 +0000

In answer to your question, yes. I am a Speech-Language Pathologist with a 7 year old with Asperger’s. She was difficult to diagnose at first because of her language delays due to frequent and severe ear infections. As her language skills improved we began to see that her characteristics fit in more with Asperger’s Syndrome than Autism. Hope this helps!!
Lynda

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

priscilla — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 20:01:36 +0000

8 Months ago my son was diagnose with AS, not Know much about it yet, im still trying to accept it. but im confused in one thing, i have read that Aspies childrens doesnt have problems with their comunication skills, but my son has ecolalia, and other language problems.i even thought he was an autistic boy, but not aspergers. but his social skills are very variable, sometimes hi interact with others but if there is to many he is apart, he plays a lot with his baby brother , and care for him.he loves to kiss and hug, he is not afraid-aparently- to knew people, and every now and then he even invites another children to play with him. The tantrums are ocasional but i manage my self so it ends very quickly… he responds to his terapys very fast.. even the profesionasl who works with him are very surprise…
i read a lot…dont want to be confuse…can or cannot the aspies have language problems…

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

Karla — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 18:20:48 +0000

For us it began in Kindergaten. My daughter couldn’t understand why she was the only child that could read and do math. I told her that not all children were at her leval and they might not have mommys that teach them. Her reply was… “MOMMY, my brain was smart when I was 4, so why isn’t their brain just smart?” We then explained to her that her brain worked a little differant. I don’t think that she fully understood until just this past yr. at 7yr. She of course doesn’t fully grasp it, but has asked a ton of questions and understands more than we know. She comes up w/ analagies to explain differances or problems. We saw a shirt on a website that said Aspie squish Team. She busted out laughing and said, that’s cuz we like that huh mommy, like when you squish me up and make me laugh when I’m grumpy? (I tell her I’m squishing the grumpy bugs out) We have also discussed that at some point people may be mean or make comments but that is because they are ignorant and do not understand what it is like to have Aspergers and that is why we need to teach people about it. She was sad because she couldn’t understand the concept of people not accepting someone that was differant, and not feels it very important to tell people about Aspergers. We always tell her that Aspergers may cause things to bother her sometimes but it also makes her special and able to do things she wouldn’t be able to do without it. She at 7 in no way feels labeled or differant in a bad way. We preach that everyone is differant wether they have something or not and you have to respect that differance. To her having Aspergers is no differant than the fact that I like chocolate ice cream and she likes vanilla. Yes she does have some accomadations to make life easier but we also stress that just because she has this does not mean it’s an excuse. It doesn’t give you a free pass in life and you cannot use it just to get your way. We also have to explain choices… yes none of the other kids wear headphones during drills or PE and they might laugh, but which is worse… that or the sounds that hurts your ears. If it bothers you worse what they will think, can you cope w/ the sound w/out a meltdown.
I’m very glad we don’t hide it from her. Most of these children are smart enough to know they are not like the others. Even if they dont care or act ovblivious, they know. Know there is a reason why, is in my opion a kind of comfort. “there is a REASON why I’m like this.” And really you don’t need to necessarily sit down and say, “OK, you have Aspergers and this is what it is and what you’ll be like” Rather just not hide it. Don’t go overboard but do explain to people about it. Don’t tell them this is how you’ll be, but when something comes up say, “well this is part of Aspergers and why” just be open an communicative and supportive. Don’t pity, don’t look at it negatively. I have found w/ others it makes life much easier to be forward and explain. There was a little girl in our class that thought my daughter didn’t like her because she didn’t talk to her, which my daughter actually loved this little girl. I explained Aspergers to her mother and then w/ her and now they are great friends and even when Keeley w/draws on days, the little girl knows how to deal w/ her now and not take it personally. I always believe not only just w/ Aspergers but w/ everything, that it is vitally important to be completely honest w/ your children. Even if it’s something that may be hard to swallow at first, they will be glad you didn’t hide it from them.
They have the disorder and it’s not going away, regardless of wether we want to accept that fact or not. They will have to know at some point in their life. Might as well just know from the start. Most people w/ Aspergers I find not to accept surprises well!

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

Kathy — Sat, 28 Feb 2009 00:46:23 +0000

We did not realize our son had Asperger’s until he was 31. He was constantly in trouble and blamed for everything.I thought he just had a slow start and when he reached a certain age, it wouldn’t matter or be noticed by anyone. One day we were told about someone who went through similar struggles with social skills. He spent many nights crying himself to sleep with the idea he is retarded. Still it was good news to find out he could get help, and instead of getting mad at things he couldn’t control we could learn to talk. We are now able to seek the proper sources for support. He does try to use it as an excuse, but we try to help him sort out the difference of what he can and can’t expect of himself. While there is much to learn, he is beginning to accept help. He has an eight year old son that shows all the signs of having the same problem – even more severe. Hopefully he will get the help he needs soon.

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

wilma rafferty — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 10:46:10 +0000

tell him as soon as you think he can cope with the information, my son is 16 now, i have been fighting with everyone who would listen trying to him diagnosed since he was 7, i had to go to the DORE programme privately for any sort of diagnosis, he is struggling comoming to termsith his diagnosis as he knows he is different and cant understand why. i think if i had time when he was younger i could have prepared him better, he was only diagnosed last year normal teenage hormonal problems added with aspergersis a nightmare for us as a family but is worse for Andrew

When should I tell my son about his diagnosis of Aspergers?

wejing — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 04:33:09 +0000

In regards to Adult Aspies.
Male ealry 50’s, just dx’d.
Too say life is a [ mystery is a true statement], but Trudy did get it wrong, many of us, have bits of this and bits of that, which confuse some of us, searching, to try and [ understand our journeys], and where we are this for me, may just be me], that no other Adult. Has this state of constant confusion, OCD plays it’s major parts in and thru my life as a Aspie.
Psychotic medication, helps in the sense of [ sleep], compared to days of old, when sleep came naturally, for me, is a thing of the past.
Aspects of others posts, are not part of my ability to be fluent in the words, I want and need to convey, so I must cut n paste, others words, to say this is me and what I go through.
It’s a [ crap of a way too go forward ], but it has to do. Counting anything and everything, helps alay [ fears are profound PTSD], is a result of the endless ] not knowing or understanding], prevelant for me, my friend Wejing allows me use of her, list to say part a very small part, of the [ world of confusion that this Aspie ], continues to learn and grow, but at my rate not of the average persons out there whom really are just looking into a looking glass that rarely reflects back the true inner world of a Aspie].
Research oh please, those of power, please do more research, FMRI have shown some major insights, but more is needed and as a worldwide interlink of said research so all Aspie’s young and mature, get a chance, to show beyond that of our behaviours, and please excuse my non, grammar correction, but that is me. Another may say what they need to say, in a paragraph, imagine 8-10 pages to do the same, CBT and Alpha wave cd, are a major help, but just small tools, in a armory that is less used, of skills?
Hope this little insight, helps some of you mums n dads n siblings out there reading this, nothing is ever written, that is so. It is the learned sense of, ['Growing up'as beings], whom have a tad harder insight at being a human being imho.
Skye